Prelude to a Kiss
by 2shy the Shippy
Summary: It's an implied rule that you must to deal with the consequences of your choices. Garcia/Kevin implied. Morgan/Garcia angst.


Morgan sipped his champagne, and then laid his head back against the tree

Morgan sipped his champagne, and then laid his head back against the tree. It wasn't meant to be and he knew that. Sometimes, the hero didn't get the girl. Sometimes the hero was too fucked up to love the girl as she should be loved, just sometimes. But, who says the guy she ends up with is necessarily bad? He just isn't the hero.

The cool wind caressed his face as he closed his eyes. It told him that he'll live. The pain wouldn't get any better—it wouldn't dull, but he'll live. Yes, his love will forever hurt and be just underneath the surface, but he'll survive. He would function as he always has, but he knows that the pain will never leave. It would always be a remainder of what he could never have. It would always be just within reach, but in someway unobtainable.

He was starting to get buzzed, but that was alright. Morgan grabbed the champagne bottle of the ground and filled his glass to the brim. It wasn't supposed to happen this way. He wasn't supposed to love her and since he did, he was supposed to let her go. But, he couldn't and he wouldn't, so he mourns for a love that will never be. His heart aches and his love overflows; it is undying and never-ending. It wasn't supposed to happen this way.

As much as Morgan didn't want to get up, he had to because his bladder was about to explode. He had drunk most of a champagne bottle by itself and it was running right through him. His trip to the bathroom was uneventful, but quite a relief. While he walked, he poured himself another glass. Alcohol seemed to be his closest friend tonight.

"Derek!" Morgan stopped; he thought he heard his name. He dismissed it and continued to walk. "Derek!"

Morgan turned around and saw Penelope jogging after him. She held her dress up as she jogged and was careful not to take a misstep.

"Wait up." She called out as Morgan stared at her in curiosity. Why was she out here and not at her wedding? They stood in silence for a minute as Penelope caught her breath. "Why aren't you at my wedding?"

"I was thinking the same thing." Morgan smirked before pinching the bridge of his nose. He was beyond buzz...definitely drunk, but aware.

"Well, I was looking for you." Penelope moved closer to Morgan as she looked his in the eyes.

"I've just been out here chillin'; nothing much." Morgan put his hands in his pockets and looked everywhere, except for the person in front of him. "And technically, I was at your wedding, I just stepped out briefly during the reception."

"Fair enough." Penelope whispered. "Are you ready to come back in?"

It was a very well laced question which both of them knew meant something else. She was really asking, "Are you ready to accept me as Mrs. Lynch?"

"To be honest, I don't know." He thought he could handle her being with someone else, but boy, was he wrong. "But, I can't stay here forever."

"Yeah, you're going to have to make a decision eventually." Penelope wanted Morgan to be happy for her and she knew he was in his own way, but she wanted him to show it. Was she asking for too much? Was she not being understanding? Maybe, but she did not want to regret her decision. She did not want to be wrong.

"I have." Morgan picked up a rock and began to toss it back and forth in his hands.

"I thought you were currently indecisive."

"I'm taking the job in New York." Penelope sharply inhaled. "I'm not going to lie and say recent events haven't influenced my decision because it has, heavily. But, I'm too invested and it effects my decisions. I need to breaks ties and move on and I can't with constant reminders."

Penelope was trying to hold back her tears, but they fell anyway. "Kinda ironic, wouldn't you say? All this time I've been afraid that you would be taken from me, but instead you voluntarily leave." She laughed slightly before fiercely wiping her eyes.

Tears slowly fell down Morgan's face as well, but he didn't care to wipe them off. They caressed his face as they slid down and hit the ground. He quickly sniffed, and then wiped his face because it was getting too wet.

"Yeah...there is some irony in that." Morgan scratched the back of his head. "I never pursued you because I didn't want to get hurt—I didn't want to hurt you, but that is exactly what happened because I didn't pursue you."

Morgan began to laugh and Garcia joined him. They laugh because they were hurt. They laughed because of their stupidity. They laughed because of their stupid fears and defenses. They laughed because they never would be more alive than they were at that moment. Her wedding, his new job, and the lives they begin to live after this day will never compare to this moment. It would never compare to the heartbreak that makes you truly examine what is true and what is not.

They laughed because life gave them lemons and they decided to throw them instead. They laughed because life could be fucked up at times. Lastly, they laughed because of the irony; they were in love with one another, but they weren't marrying each other. They weren't going to be together and live happily ever after, they just weren't.

After the laughter subsided, they looked at one another. Penelope grabbed the lapel of Morgan's jacket and rubbed it. Morgan could sense that she longed to be close to him. She wanted to have physical intimacy with him and experience the honesty of his love. How she wished to feel the touch of his fingertips against her skin as well as his lips. She longed for the passion and the intensity of Derek Morgan. She wanted to feel him between her legs—inside her being driving her wild. Pushing her to the edge and being unrelenting. Making her breathless, until she could hear her heart pounding rapidly in her chest. She would long to feel the perspiration drip off his forehead and hit some random place on her body. Or to see a crease of concentration on his forehead as in put in work to satisfy her. She knew they wouldn't be any closer than they would be at that moment; exploring and tasting one another.

If it had ever happened, Penelope knew she would have fiercely clutched the sheets and bit her lip from screaming out his name. Her head would have been thrown to the side as she whimpered repeatedly because love had never felt so good. Penelope would have never felt so complete. Afterwards, she would lay her head on his chest and softly rub his abs or maybe kiss it—no, she would be too tired. She would lay there and they would intertwine there fingers. They wouldn't talk, but just be because they were content. There would be a companionable silence between them and it would be lovely.

Penelope wanted to voice her thoughts. She wanted to get that one moment...take her chances because there would never be another one. But, it was wrong—she just made vows.

"I'm going to miss you." Penelope whispered. Morgan pulled her into a hug.

"Not nearly as much as I'm going to miss you." He whispered back. Morgan placed a moist kiss on her forehead before rested his forehead against hers. He separated from her briefly before placing a kiss on her mouth. It wasn't meant to be disrespectful to Kevin, but it needed to be done and expressed. Garcia responded, but not as passionately because maybe what should happen would happen and she would never forgive herself if it did.

Sometimes, just sometimes, Penelope wished she wasn't so caring.


End file.
